I just want to shout this out loud and clear:
GOD’S LOVE IS NOT DEPENDENT ON YOUR ACTIONS.
I’m sure that you have had one of those seasons in your life where you seem to be a little busier. A little more preoccupied. Putting in a little less prayer and bible time. Not doing as much as you could be for the Lord (or at least it feels that way). I know I definitely have. In fact, I feel like I am in one of those seasons right now. It seems like I have a lot of things on the brain that don’t really have to do specifically with the Lord… preparing for baby, learning to be a good wife, pregnancy, etc. Sometimes the devil likes to get in my head and make me feel really guilty for not “doing as much as I can” for the Lord. How do I know it’s the devil? Because God brings convictions that are meant to bring you closer to Him. The devil makes you feel guilty, which in turn makes you feel too ashamed to go to God, or makes you want to do the thing you haven’t just to get the guilt off your back- definitely not the right motivation. And that is exactly how I had been feeling for a while. I would read the bible out of guilt. I would sit down and pray in hopes that somehow it would please God.
I didn’t have to do that for very long before God stepped in. “Alyssa, you don’t have to try to earn my love. You are my child, and I love you as you are. Relax. Just soak in my presence, and I will give you a peace that surpasses understanding.” Oh how I felt such a HUGE weight lift off my shoulders. I just lied down. Breathed. Listened to the words of the worship music that I had on. I repented for giving in to the condemnation of the devil and He gave me that incredible peace that you can’t really understand unless you’ve experienced it. It also helped that He was so divinely guiding the shuffle on my Ipod to songs that I enjoyed singing praises to Him to in the past. Because of the guilt that the devil had put on me (and that I made the mistake of accepting), I hadn’t been able to truly enter into worship for a quite awhile.. more than a few months. I was distracted, and ashamed, therefore I wasn’t able to truly focus on God and praising Him and worshipping Him. But now, with that weight off of my shoulders, I entered in. My sole focus was on Him. I opened my bible with the right motivation (to worship God) and the words stood out to me like they hadn’t in quite a while. Instead of feeling guilty about “not doing enough”, I am now excited about the prospect of doing more. Wow.
Oh what a loving God we have. It’s amazing to know that He loves us where we are at and that He doesn’t bring guilt upon us in order to get us to serve Him. It is so awesome that the convictions He brings through the Holy Spirit make it so easy for us to come to Him and want to serve Him.
I like the words of a Jeremy Riddle song to describe this:
“At the cross you beckon me. You draw me gently to my knees. And I am lost for words, so lost in love. And I am sweetly broken, wholly surrendered.”
Listen to it here- Sweetly Broken by Jeremy Riddle- youtube